I clench my fists in frustration, ignoring the pain that shoots through my already abused fingertips as I do. This is important, really important. I have to remember what happened to Hudson.
Did I leave him chained up somewhere, a threat to no one?
Did he escape and that’s why my hands are so beaten up—because I tried to stop him?
Or—and I hate this idea the most—did he use his gift of persuasion on me and get me to just let him go? And if so, is that why my memory is shot to hell?
The not knowing is killing me, as is the fear that I’ve let everyone down.
Jaxon fought so hard to get rid of Hudson the first time. He sacrificed everything, including whatever love his mother had for him, in order to destroy his brother—and to keep Hudson from destroying the whole world.
How can I live with myself if we find out that I just let him walk away? That I gave him a chance to continue wreaking havoc on Katmere and the world?
That I gave him another chance to hurt the boy I love?
That thought more than any other feeds the fear inside me and has me croaking out, “We need to find him,” in a voice hoarse with concern. “We need to figure out where he went and make sure he can’t hurt anyone else.”
And we need to figure out why I’m certain I’m forgetting something very important that happened during those four months.
Before it’s too late.
7
What I Don’t Know
Will Hurt Me…
and Everyone Else
After Marise checks me over for what feels like hours, Uncle Finn finally lets Jaxon take me away. It’s obvious from the way both men and Marise fretted over me that no one was taking my health for granted, which was comforting. Marise even checked me for a brain injury because, well, hello, amnesia.
But I am unbelievably healthy, minus some scrapes and bruises on my hands, and deemed fit to reenter Katmere Academy. Apparently, being stone for four months could be the next big health craze.
As Jaxon and I walk casually back to my room, though, my mind can’t stop replaying a part of my conversation with Marise, when she was apologizing for not knowing more about gargoyle physiology.
“You’re the first gargoyle to exist in a thousand years.”
Fantastic. Because who doesn’t want to be a trendsetter when it comes to their basic physiology? Oh, right. Everyone.
Not going to lie, I have absolutely no idea how to process the information that I’m the first modern-day one of my kind, so I file it away in a folder marked: “Shit I Don’t Need to Deal with Today.” And another one titled “Thanks for the Heads-Up, Mom and Dad.”
Just then, I notice that Jaxon’s not leading me to my room but to his tower rooms. I tug on his hand to get his attention. “Hey, we can’t head to your rooms. I need to stop by mine for a few minutes; then I want to take a quick shower and grab a granola bar before heading to class.”
“Class?” He looks shocked. “Wouldn’t you rather rest today?”
“I’m pretty sure I’ve been ‘resting’ for the last four months. What I really want to do is get back to class and catch up on what I missed. I’m supposed to graduate in two and a half months, and I don’t even want to think about how many missing assignments I have.”
“We always knew you’d come back, Grace.” He smiles down at me and squeezes my hand. “So your uncle and teachers already have a plan in place. You just need to set up appointments to talk to them about it.”
“Oh, wow. That’s awesome.” I give him a tight hug. “Thank you for your help with everything.”
He hugs me back. “You don’t need to thank me. That’s what I’m here for.” He pivots, and we switch directions and head to my room. “Mrs. Haversham should have emailed your new schedule by now. It changed at the semester, even though…” His voice trails off.
“Even though I wasn’t here to change with it,” I finish, because I’ve just decided that I’m not going to spend the rest of the school year tiptoeing around my new reality. It is what it is, and the sooner we all learn to live with it, the sooner things will get back to normal. Myself included.
I’ve got a long list of questions to ask Jaxon and Macy about gargoyles. And once I get the answers, I’m going to start trying to figure out how to live with it gracefully. Tomorrow. On the plus side, the fact that I don’t have horns should make the graceful part a lot easier to bear.
Jaxon stares down at me, and I expect him to kiss me—I’ve been dying to kiss him from the moment he walked into my uncle’s office—but when I lean in to him, he subtly shakes his head. The rejection stings a little, at least until I remember just how many people were staring at me when I was walking through the halls earlier.
That was more than an hour ago. Now that word has probably gotten around that the resident gargoyle is human again, I can’t imagine how many people will be watching us—even though class is supposed to be in session.
Sure enough, when we turn the corner into one of the side hallways, people are everywhere—and every single one of them is looking at us. I can feel myself tensing up before we’ve taken more than a step or two. They drop their eyes when Jaxon walks by, though.
Jaxon wraps an arm around my shoulders, then ducks his head until his mouth is almost pressed against my ear. “Don’t worry about them,” he murmurs. “Once everyone gets a look at you, things will settle down.”
I know he’s right—after my first couple of days here, no one paid any attention to me at all, unless I was walking beside Jaxon. There’s no reason to think that will change now. Thankfully. Notoriety isn’t exactly my speed.
We book it to my room, turning what’s usually a ten-minute walk into one that’s closer to five or six. And still it isn’t fast enough. Not with Jaxon beside me, his arm around my shoulders. His long, lean body pressed against my side.
I need him to be closer, need to feel his arms around me and his soft lips on mine.
Jaxon must feel the same way, because once we hit the top of the stairs, his quick walk turns into something closer to a jog. And by the time we get to my room, my hands are trembling and my heart is beating way too fast.
Thank God Macy left the door unlocked, because I’m not sure Jaxon wouldn’t have torn the thing off the hinges otherwise. Instead, he pushes open the door and ushers me through it, hissing only a little as Macy’s enchanted curtain brushes against his bare forearm.
“Is your arm okay?” I ask as the door closes behind us. Jaxon is too busy pushing me up against it to answer.