Olivia follows me into my kitchen, where I fill a glass with ice water and drain it in seconds.
“Date didn’t go well, huh?” she asks, pulling a fruit tray from my fridge.
“What, that picture of us kissing didn’t convince you?” I pop a piece of cantaloupe into my mouth as she snickers.
“You looked like a deer caught in headlights.”
“Maybe that’s why she only gave me a three out of five on the kiss scale.”
Olivia snorts, but so much genuine compassion shines in her eyes. “I’m sorry it didn’t work out.”
I shrug. “It’s cool. I’m getting used to the idea that there’s no one out there for me.”
She frowns. “I don’t believe that, Adam. Not a single bit.”
“I’m tired of looking,” I admit quietly.
“Maybe that’s the point. Maybe when you stop looking and just live…maybe that’s when you find your magic.”
I smile at the thought as I hug Olivia’s tiny frame to mine before she heads outside. Magic sounds nice.
My phone rings as I pull burgers and sausages from the fridge, my mom’s face staring up at me from the screen. Her deep brown eyes and wide grin as she stands next to me after my first NHL game, proud as ever and barely reaching my shoulders, bring me a level of comfort that’s hard to find anywhere else.
I tuck my phone between my ear and shoulder as I set the meat on a board. “Hi, Mom.”
“Hi, honey. What are you up to?”
“About to start the barbecue,” I tell her as a shriek and a splash sound through the door.
“Wish Dad and I were there to join you.” She hesitates, her tone somber when she speaks next. “Maybe we need to visit sooner than later.”
My chest tightens. “Is everything okay?”
“Well, your dad and I are worried, because…” Another pause, and is that—
“Are you laughing?”
“No,” she snickers. “It’s just, we’re really worried about you because—” giggle “—apparently you’re only a—” snort “—three out of five on the kiss scale,” she finally chokes out, nearly drowned by the boom of my dad’s laughter.
“For fuck’s sake. You two are brutal.”
“And she didn’t feel a love connection !” She wheezes, gasping for air, and my eyes find a permanent space in the back of my head.
“Don’t forget the tongue work!” Dad shouts. “He needs some serious tongue work!”
“I hate you,” I grumble.
When she finally gets a handle on her laughter—she might be crying—she says, “I’m sorry, honey. Keeping up with your love life on social media is our favorite way to spend Sunday mornings.”
“Not much of a love life.”
“Maybe you need to step back for a bit,” she suggests.
“Yeah, Ollie was just saying the same thing.”
“You’ve got a great bunch surrounding you, honey. If you’re looking for love, take a look at the people who show up for you every day. When you find someone who makes you feel like that, an extension of your family, you’ll know.”
I know she’s right. The laughter that surrounds me on my best and worst days brings me a contentment I couldn’t live without, and as I head outside and watch my friends make my home their own, I know that if they were all I had for the rest of this life, I’d be okay.
But it still doesn’t stop me from wishing for someone to call my own at nighttime when the quiet sets in.
“Hi, princess,” I whisper, scooping Ireland up and kissing her tiny nose. I tug on the strap of her pink gingham sun hat, and she beams up at me, toothless, pulling in those Beckett dimples in her frilly bathing suit. “Jesus, you’re cute as fuck.”
“That’s a Beckett trait,” Carter says, swimming to the edge of the pool. “Ireland, baby, look! Look at Daddy! Watch what I can do!” He presses his feet against the pool wall and launches himself backward, flipping underwater, emerging with a gasp. “Did you see me, princess? Did you see Daddy? Ten outta ten, right, baby?”
I tickle her cheek. “Wasn’t watching.”
“Aw, man.” Carter slaps the water and swims away.
“Your daddy is too much sometimes, isn’t he?” I murmur to Ireland, setting her back down on her blanket, stretching out beside her.
Her innocent green eyes stare up at me as I drive her favorite light-up bug car around her, and I can’t help letting my mind wander back to another set of green eyes. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve done this, let my thoughts drift to Rosie. That sweet smile, those honey blonde locks with streaks of soft pink, the gold freckles splashed across her cheekbones, the way that dog looked up at her like she was her whole world.
Hours later, when I’m sitting at the edge of the pool, watching the sun sink behind the spectacular backdrop, when it’s quiet and my dog’s head rests on my thigh, I’m still thinking about her.
My patio door slides open, and Jaxon sits beside me, handing me a beer and dipping his legs in the water. “I’ll never get tired of this view.”
“Me neither.” I take a long pull on my drink, licking the taste from my lips, and for the hundredth time, I wonder what Rosie’s mouth tastes like. Jaxon’s probably not the one to talk to about this, but he’s the only other single one in our group, so he’s the only one still here tonight. “I met someone yesterday.”
“Yeah, dude, I know. That picture has two-hundred-and-fifty thousand likes on Instagram. Everyone knows.”
I chuckle, an exhausted sound, and scrub my eyes. “Someone else. Yesterday, when Bear and I went for a hike.”
His brows rise. “Oh? And? Spill the tea.”
“She was…I donno.” I palm the back of my neck, thinking back on Rosie. “So cute. She’s in vet school, and she was walking a dog from the animal shelter. She’d made special treats for the dog, and she shared some with Bear. Shared her lunch with me too. The dog she was with has had a rough life, she said, and she was just so patient with her.” I shrug. “She was just really sweet.”
“You’re telling me you found someone who actually likes dogs and isn’t just pretending? You hit the jackpot, buddy.”
“Shut up, asshole.”
He laughs, sips his beer. “Seriously. Sounds like something worth exploring.”
“Yeah, I think so.”
“And how was she about the hockey stuff?”
“Didn’t come up.” I remember the way I searched her eyes for any hint of excitement when I introduced myself, how her wide gaze gave nothing away. “I don’t think she recognized me.”
“Not a huge hockey fan, then. That’s okay. Kinda what you wanted, right?”
“Would be nice to know if she likes me for me, that’s for sure.”
“So you gonna call her and ask her out?”
I cringe. “I would, but, uh…I didn’t get her number.”
“Jesus, Adam, rookie mistake.”
“I wasn’t thinking straight. I was all…” I run a hand through my hair, tugging. “Bamboozled.”